Separation anxiety


So I’m doing this thing right now. I’m in the middle of taking my yoga teacher training to the next level (500 RYT), but that’s not it.

I’m seeking the truth, and being willing to come apart. Well, this week, anyway.

As part of this training program, I’m currently on day three of forty days of a “personal revolution.” The words of Baron Baptiste, not me. But you know, why sugar coat it?

I’m on day three of forty days of yoga, meditation, mindful eating and personal inquiry. Yeah, I went ahead and threw that last one on there like it’s nothing. Just a little personal inquiry. Just a little exploration of challenging questions that force you to dive into what’s going on inside your head – and heart – and then try to process what you find. NBD…

This is what I do, right? All day and all night, and I help other people do it, too. I’m SO set.

I’m pretty sure the clearest sign that you don’t know everything is thinking that you do.

This is hard work.

First, seek the truth. Usually, we think that means assessing honesty outside of ourselves. Are the people and messages around us true? But really, it’s about turning within, and seeking the truth that lies inside ourselves. Who do we think we are, and why? What are the messages we have processed from others AND that we send ourselves about that question, and are they true? Which leads directly to point number two.

Be willing to come apart.

Some of that truth you find within yourself might start to shift those ideas and messages about “who you are.” And that, y’all, is scary AF. Even more, turns out that process is, well, a process. It’s not about one eye-(or heart-) opening moment, although those are reallllly nice and all. It’s about becoming a person who realizes that “who you are” is an idea that is made up of a lot of things, some of which may not be true to you when you really get down to it. And also, all of it can and will change over time.

You, as an evolving being, are always engaged in the perpetual motion of growth. Or that is, you can be. If you’re willing to do the work to let go of the perceptions that might be holding you back. To have all those stitched together pieces come apart. To discover what they’re actually made of, and to decide how they come together for yourself.

There’s an age-old saying that the truth will set you free. In reality, though, you’re free already. Unless, of course, you’re holding yourself back by putting all of your beautiful energy into holding it all together.

Photo credit: frank mckenna

2 thoughts on “Separation anxiety”

  1. I was just thinking about this earlier this week! We nearly lost our dog, but we didn’t, but every time, in the morning, when I had to go back to work. I would be sick, then at work,would feel fine again. So I’m wondering if I was making myself sick, but not being with our dog.

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